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Reindeer Files Injunction Against Kriss Kringle
Thursday, Dec. 18, 2003 - 8:51 PM
Elville, North Pole - Today a reindeer known as Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer filed an injunction against Christopher Kringle. A judge granted the injunction after several hours of deliberation over whether or not Mr. Kringle was an equal opprotunity employer. "He just felt that Mr. Kringle and his elves were not allowing any handicapable reindeer to pull his sleigh," Rudolph's lawyer, Mr. Frost, said. Rudolph evidentally found that his inability to be employed by Mr. Kringle and his company "Santa's Workshop" was creating a biased against him in the other reindeer. In Rudolph's press conference, he made a breif statement before allowing Mr. Frost to finish the meeting with the press. Rudolph's statement in its entirety was, "I mean, after a while, they started pointing their hooves at me and laughing and calling me names. They wouldn't even let me join in any of their games. I have a shiney nose. Is that a crime?" Mr. Frost told reporters that the judge ordered Santa's Workshop to employ Rudolph and other handicapable reindeer or face fines in excess of 37M Sugar Plums ($12M USD). Mr. Kringle says Rudolph's first day at work will be this Christmas Eve. Part of the judge's orders states that Rudolph or another handicapable reindeer will have to be put in a managerial position. It is reported that Rudolph will be given the lead spot in the train of reindeer. "This will be an especially difficult run as the forecast shows lots of fog," said Mr. Kringle who was especially jolly for someone that was just handed a court order. "I hope he can keep his act together and make it, to all, a good night."
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