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This Is All Fake
Thursday, Sept. 19, 2002 - 4:09 AM
Sometimes I conduct orchestras in my spare time. I've also been known to produce underground films about raising goats. I've bought 273 kinds of gum in 63 countries. When I'm really, really bored I weave baskets. I like playing Mozart on my guitar that I made from an orange juice container, a paper towel roll and rubber bands. If the situation calls for it, I can speak Lebonese. I can drink a gallon and a half of Jack Daniel's and pass a sobriety test. I do happen to know Jack. Nice guy.
Speak Up
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