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Never Underestimate the Power of Soup (Part III)
Tuesday, Aug. 20, 2002 - 8:07 PM
Never Underestimate the Power of Soup (Part III) Link to Part I That was it! Sachrin. What better way to fend for myself than through a carcinogen? Immediatly I ran to the cupboard to get my industrial size, industrial strength bucket of Sachrin. "How could I get the soup thugs to ingest the Sachrin," I wondered. Then it hit me. Crackers don't harm soup. Soup loves crackers. The crackers sop up the soup, though, and the soup eventually loses its life. I would bake some crackers loaded with Sachrin. In fact, they'd be all (or nearly all) Sachrin. I had my industrial size, industrial strength bucket of Sachrin, but I had not flour, so I ordered some on ebay. When my flour finally got here I made my crackers. I walked outside with them. The thugs were shooting craps by the dumpster and immediatly saw me. "Give us your wallet," they said. "I don't have another one yet," I said. "JC Penny was out of stock, so it's on backorder." "What's that in the large box?" they asked. "Crackers." "Give those to us then!" they demanded. "Okay, okay, here." I gave them the crackers and they flipped open their lids and began shoving them in the cans. Nothing happened at first... but then, all of a sudden, one of the cans (the one with the eye patch) started to giggle. His giggle turned into a chuckle, and his chuckle became a laugh. Then one by one the rest of the soup thugs began laughing. The Sachrine wasn't a carcinogen at all to soup! It was a drug! I'd gotten the soups high! They pulled out their tiny switch-can openers and flashed them at me. I was scared of the high soup thugs, so I ran back in the house. I had to plan for tomorrow. What was I going to do tomorrow, you ask? The same thing I do every day. Try to get past those soup thugs. << < >
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